Whether you’re in the midst of a divorce, contemplating one, or need to change an existing child custody agreement, you likely already know how contentious child custody can get when parents don’t agree. A Mount Pleasant, SC child custody lawyer can be a huge help as you hammer out an agreement with your child’s other parent.
How Can a Child Custody Lawyer Help You Negotiate a Child Custody Agreement?
Probably the most important thing about having a lawyer work with you is that it makes it much more likely you’ll be able to come to an agreement without having to go to court. Obviously, if you go to court you will want a lawyer, and it might seem counterintuitive to say that the lawyer could keep you out of court. But it parents find it difficult to negotiate, each side having a lawyer who can passionately represent their own client’s best interests while also staying focused on the importance of an agreement often makes it possible for a couple to come to an agreement outside the courtroom.
The benefit here is that any agreement you come up with is likely to be accepted by the court unless it is not in the best interest of the child. In fact, the courts prefer for families to work these things out on their own whenever possible. If you can’t work it out, however, it will be up to the court to do so. At that point, you lose a lot of control over the process and may end up with an agreement that makes life more difficult for you and your kids. Here’s what your lawyer will do to help you:
Help You Understand the Types of Custody
To come up with an agreement, you have to understand South Carolina’s laws about child custody. Generally speaking, there are two types of custody: sole and joint. When one parent has sole custody, they make all the decisions for the child, and the child lives with them. When there’s joint custody, all these responsibilities are shared.
It’s possible for one parent to have primary custody physically, meaning that the child spends most of their time with that parent, while the parents work together to make all the major decisions for their children. This is a common arrangement that often works when one parent is keeping the family home, and it’s in the best interest of the children to remain there. It’s also common if one parent lives significantly closer to the children’s school, and it would be inconvenient for the children to navigate their day if they spent extensive time at the other parent’s home during the week.
The courts assume that both parents are capable of taking care of their children and supporting them, unless there is compelling evidence to the contrary. This means if you believe you should have sole custody of your child, you will need to prove it with clear evidence.
Help You Think Through What the Courts Will Look At
The courts will want to look at many factors as they review your agreement for child custody. It pays to go over all of these factors on your own before trying to present an agreement to the court. The courts will have the child’s best interest as their primary focus, and that means they’re going to look at the ability of each parent to care for the child, the stability of the home environments, the relationship that the child has with both parents, as well as things about the child themselves, like their age, cultural and spiritual needs, preferences, temperament, relationship with any siblings or other family members that may be in the area, and more.
The child’s preference is always something the court wants to hear, and the older the child is, the more weight this carries. However, a child’s preference in this matter is never the deciding factor. The court will also look carefully at the parents and their financial situations, parenting styles, the kind of home life they can offer, how interested each parent has been historically in the child’s education, health and development, and more. Other important factors include the physical and mental health of the parents and the child as well as any history of violence or abuse, whether that was directed at the child or not.
Keep You Focused in Discussions
It’s natural for parents to disagree sometimes about what is best for their child. This happens in every family whether or not the parents are divorced. If the parents are separated, however, these discussions can get harder. One important thing that your lawyer will do for you is to help you stay focused as you discuss child custody arrangements. In other words, your lawyer will help you think constantly about the child’s best interests, the requirements of the court, your own long-term needs, and what you’re there to do: negotiate.
Review All Agreements
Finally, your lawyer will help you with these negotiations by reviewing any agreements to make sure they’re fair and will be accepted by the court. Even if you and the other parent have made a lot of the decisions already and think you’ve come to an agreement, it’s still best to run it by a lawyer to make sure that it’s going to be acceptable to the South Carolina Family Courts. It also needs to be drafted in the right way and be submitted to the court with all the proper accompanying paperwork, which your lawyer can help you put together.
Myths About Child Custody
Mothers Always Get Custody
In the past, it was more likely for mothers to get custody and for fathers to be required to pay child support. Those days are over, and the South Carolina courts do not automatically give custody to mothers. Every case is evaluated individually.
You Can’t Change a Custody Agreement
Many people believe that once an agreement is placed, there’s nothing they can do to change it. Fortunately, this is not true at all. While the courts will not change a custody agreement lightly and will expect to see some compelling evidence for why they should consider the change, the courts are also aware that circumstances change. If there’s been a major change in the child’s life or in the life of one of the parents, you can petition the court to make a change to a custody agreement.
Joint Custody Means Equal Time
Even when you have joint custody, that doesn’t mean you have to split your time with a child exactly in half. As you negotiate, bear this in mind. Joint custody means above all that the parents share the responsibility of making decisions for their child.
Contact an Experienced Child Custody Attorney in South Carolina Today
Child custody can be difficult to negotiate, but when you and the other parent are able to do so, you can keep control over your own family’s future. As well-intentioned as the courts are, no one knows your children better than you.